This very secret heart

Secret Heart
Why so mysterious
Why so sacred
Why so serious
I've waited for a long time,
and my feelings are hurt.
Think about me for a second,
even if it's the first.

Maybe you're afraid,
don't be. Really.
What could it be?
I've only good things in store.

Let me into your secret heart.

Stopped in my tracks.

I have the most amazing friends in the world.
It never ceases to amaze me how strong, kind, loving, beautiful, and intelligent they all are.
I am so proud of them for everything they've accomplished.
They will forever be my role models, and I feel so lucky to have them in my life.

I feel nauseous.

I had a dream last night about the first day of university. I was so incredibly nervous. Probably because I actually am. Now i have a constant nervous feeling in my stomach, and I want to puke. It's easy to watch other people move away and go to school, but it's actually setting in that I will be moving away and going to university. I've been saying it, but not believing it. Oh God.

Karma

Just for kicks, I thought I would watch Twilight. See what it's all about, ya know?
I immediately regret that decision.
I GOT RICK ROLLED.
It's karma, and i know it. I should have known better.
I can't imagine what would happen if i had tried to read the book.
I'll stick to real literature, thanks.
HALF the girls at my school carry around cheap paperback copies of Twilight with the movie poster slapped on the cover, and I bet half of those girls have the poster hanging in their room, and their movie ticket stuck in the frame of their mirror.
FUCK Twilight.

Spring?

A WHOLE week.
Of nothing.
That of course is will not happen.
My goal however,
is to read.
Starting with re-reading
my favourite short story.
Right now.

Relevant, I know.

We Feel Fine

"We Feel Fine is an exploration of human emotion on a global scale.

Since August 2005, We Feel Fine has been harvesting human feelings from a large number of weblogs. Every few minutes, the system searches the world's newly posted blog entries for occurrences of the phrases "I feel" and "I am feeling". When it finds such a phrase, it records the full sentence, up to the period, and identifies the "feeling" expressed in that sentence (e.g. sad, happy, depressed, etc.)."

Prairie Town

I've been wondering, what it means to get over something, or someone.
There's a song, that had painful attachment to a person who once made my heart ache for a year, more. Now, four years later, I rarely think of that person, but often laugh at myself for it. This song, however, makes me immensely sad when I listen to it. There is no attachment to the person, but I know that's where the sadness originated.
It's a feeling I don't want to go away. I'd really like to hold onto that twinge in my stomach, as a reminder.

It's about me, really.

The thing about the internet, is that it gives you a sense of sharing your existence with the world, but there is a definite probability that the world will not care.

I am trying to make some sort of pattern out of my life, and document all those things I'd otherwise forget, with hopes that when I read this years from now, what's passed will be magnified. I want to remember myself more than I want myself to be remembered by others.